Going Beyond Personal Reality

So, what’s this all about!?

Let’s think of it as a video game where you play yourself. Who or whatever you believe yourself to be right now, is the avatar you assume. You play dress-up, build a character, and go about your business. Then, one day, you eat an apple and forget that it’s a game. Oh-oh… It’s fine, apples are tasty so you continue playing.

Then, the inevitable sht-storm, that life can be, descends, making your game a bit… well, shit. You suffer and bear it for a while, maybe even concluding that this is the way things are meant to be. But, eventually, you say: ‘fuk this for a game’ and try to look for a way out.

You faff about a bit at first, looking for solutions in the game itself (I say a bit but it’s probably quite the detour). Then, eventually, after exploring all possible options outside of yourself, the notion dawns that, maybe, you should start to look inward instead of out. So you turn the camera around on the avatar you are in and ask: ‘who the hell am I anyway’!?

Well done! you’re now on a journey of Self discovery.

This is what ‘The Captain’s Log’ and ‘Going Beyond’ is about: understanding who you are so you can be your best self.


The (Video) Game Of Life

As I’ve said, let’s think of this journey we’re all on as some sort of video game where you play yourself. The problem is you’ve just forgotten that it’s a game and that the character you’re playing is much more malleable than you thought. It’s ok, it’s not your fault, amnesia of your essence is a necessary part of the game too.

But now it’s time to wake up from the dream. To disidentify from the personal aspect of your being so you can open up to a much wider perspective of who you are. Not to say that the ‘personal’ is bad. It’s just one slice of the pie and it can be a struggle when you’re stuck in it all the time.

So we play on. It’s just that now the objective of the game has become to awaken to the fullness of who you are. Both at a soul level and at the level of pure awareness.

It’s a journey to discover and embody more of what I’m referring to as the ‘Captain’.

The more you play the game, the more parts of yourself you discover, the wider the scope and capacity of your avatar becomes. Old unwanted parts fall away. New and exciting parts get discovered. You heal old wounds and learn new skills. And around and around you go in the weird and wonderful karmic washing machine we call life.

So, like an actual video game, when it comes to what we are striving to realise and become, there are many levels. Here are the fundamental two.

Level Zero/Infinity

Let’s start with the ultimate. At the highest level, the Captain is a slightly cringe or cliche reference to universal consciousness – that spark of awareness we all share. It’s the observer. The one watching the madness unfold, usually from the back seat. I’ll get to who’s doing the driving soon, suffice to say, he’s mostly inebriated, by which I mean unconscious.

(By the way, at this level, consciousness is gender-neutral. But to keep it simple, I’ll refer to the Captain as ‘he’. Don’t @tack me, social justice warriors!)

From this level, ‘the Captain’ is the one watching this whole shit-storm unfold. Unperturbed and chilled as Snoop Dog. He’s got all the time in the world. ( Since, of course, time doesn’t even exist on this level, Duh!) He could not give less of a shit what our avatar’s first-world problems are, so is therefore content to leave us sleepwalk our way through infinity and beyond for as long as it takes for us to wake up.

A bit like Buzz Lightyear who is still intently playing the game in the belief he’s not a toy, we are sleep walking through life in the belief that we are separate entities from the rest of existence.

At least that’s what could be true. I’m speculating slightly here. My point is that universal consciousness is content to let our avatars figure this shit out for themselves. Namely, that we’re not just powerless toys as we may sometimes feel and that (at some level and to some degree) we’re the ones actually creating the shit-storms we find so often find ourselves in.

But, “what about the poor people in china” or “the starving children in Africa”, “are they creating their own reality you obnoxious new-age hippy”!?

Who the hell knows! maybe they are, maybe when you factor in such possibilities as karma and past lives. Maybe some bored to death, sadistic soul wanted to experience first hand what it felt like to be starving in Africa because all his past lives were spent as fat Viking Kings. I’ve not gotten that far in the game myself. I do know that our thoughts create and shape reality to a much greater extent than we might first think.

Ready player one

On a more tangible level — a level or ten below universal/God/Christ consciousness. The ‘Captain’ is referring to the capacity for self-agency and autonomy in every flesh and bones human.

This level of the game is about reconnecting to the source of who we are so we can live fully empowered and purpose-driven lives. It’s about taking responsibility and waking the hell up from the limited body/mind identity were currently stuck in, to the more multi-dimensional aspect of what we are.

This is where we, as a collective, find ourselves now. Waking up from the dream of personhood – the matrix. The challenge is to figure shit out, heal our wounds and move up some levels. We’re going to have to clear out the old, to welcome the new. It may sound like “woo woo” but it’s “true-woo”!

Keeping the two in balance is the trick. Realising the ultimate is the mission while also remaining grounded in our humanness is the trick. It’s a game about balance. When the yin and the yang are in harmony you become whole and can therefore play the game like a pro.

Let me reiterate, these levels are not physical, they are levels of being/consciousness. The further you go in the game, the more subtle they become, the more you see there’s actually nowhere to go. Because everything is now and all that’s changing is our ability to see, understand, and be.

Think of it like this, a higher level is one where you experience love, joy, gratitude, or compassion. A lower level is more like a bad hangover. Of course one might be more desirable than the other but it’s not like one is really ‘better’ than the other. Both are necessary, without the hangover you may not be motivated enough to really sober up. Or another way to look at it is that without the dark night of the soul, you may never even attempt to awaken to your full potential.

The Best Part

The best part is, how we move up and get ‘there’ is different for everyone. “One mountain many paths” and all that. What brings me joy might not bring you joy and so on. There’s room for all – an infinite number of experiences to be had (or maybe already being had at some level) in this giant energetic soup we’re all surfing/swimming/drowning in. We’re all playing our own game while simultaneously contributing to the whole ‘game’ (reality) we see play out in front of us.

It can help to remember that as your perception increases the more paradoxical in nature everything can seem. From some level or perspective of reality so much of what we believed to be untrue might turn out to be true from some perspective and vice-versa. So, as you open up you’ll be glad to know that, getting sucked into absolutist arguments about the way things should or shouldn’t, becomes less and less possible and relevant.

Great! now that’s cleared up, there’ll be no more mention of Captains. My avatar finds it all too cringe-worthy still. Oh yeah, my avatar’s name is Kieran. He is… well… who he is. We’ll dip in and out of his ‘personal stuff’ whenever relevant; to make some points or whatever.

The Mission

So without further adieu, it’s time to blast off, but where are we going!? Well, excitingly enough: no-where. Everything is now. The shit-storm and the high vibes. All now.

So it’s just another routine, run-of-the-mill mission to expand our perception of reality so that it transcends the personal avatar we believe ourselves to be. In a nutshell…

Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to Go Beyond Personal Reality

Why? because that is where the hardship is. The majority of human suffering has its roots in the personal. That is to say the personal/egoic mind. Nothing wrong with it per se. It serves a purpose: growth. A fundamental rule of the game.

It’s just that we’ve been playing the same game for long enough. So long we’ve gotten lost in it and forgotten who we are. We’ve let the shit*storm harden our hearts by taking it all too seriously. Maybe we’ve lost our sense of wonder and awe at the beautiful world we live in or had our attention (the only thing we really own) highjacked by some cyborgs in cyberspace. It really doesn’t matter now. It’s not like we’re actually going anywhere physically anyway, remember.

This is a mission of raising our perception and thus our state of being. It’s about seeing ourselves from a higher perspective. It doesn’t make our personal ‘stuff’ miraculously vanish, it just means we find clarity and give it less importance. It’s not escapism either. On the contrary, it’s a total embrace of all that we are, bullshit and all. Paradoxically, a caveat to going beyond the personal is to know the person inside out – to have all our proverbial ducks in a row, so they don’t become hurdles, but stepping stones to something greater instead.

Instead of being crippled by life, and the harshness of it all, we start to play the game with a playful curiosity instead. We can choose to treat the inevitable challenges and trauma thrown at us like Mario treats mushrooms; eating them for breakfast and growing stronger and wiser because of it.

So, if you’ve had enough of chasing your tail in the same old game, constantly bumping into yourself like the snake in the old Nokia phones (Oh, how far technology has come). It’s time for something new, it’s time to bump a level — or three.

It’s time we wake up the multi-dimensionality of being. Who knows how many levels there are to this thing, just waiting to be explored.

So that is what The Captain’s Log is all about… Our perception and understanding blasting off to the infinite realms of being within our own selves. O’er the mountains and molehills of personal ‘stuff’. Straight through the inevitable layers of trauma that lurk in the shadows of our collective unconscious. Inward, to burst the bubble of ego and return home once again. The home of pure being and bliss that we were all along.

That is the mission, should you choose to accept it.

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